#173: Jailbreak

A guy with a mohawk is sitting on top of someone with ragged hair. "Hey we've come to rescue you!" he says to a prisoner in the jail with stubble. "Cool!" says Stubble Guy. In the next panel a red car RRRRR SCREEEE is straining against chains anchored to the jail, which snap. "Um." says Stubble Guy, because there are now chains hanging from the wall of the jail. "Oh well. Bye!" says Mohawk Guy. "Hey, wait!" says Stubble Guy.
Myth busted. You cannot break your partner out of jail like this IRC (in real comics).


#172: Tesla

"You use that?" says Amanda, pointing to something off-panel. "Yeah. Why?" asks Freed. "That's really out dated. You should get a Tesla." says Amanda. Fred says, "Listen, I'm not gonna switch cars every 3 years. There's always a SMARTER, PRETTIER, FASTER. Marketing tries to trick us into believing we NEED the new car. But mine is GOOD ENOUGH. I don't fall for their tricks." "But..." says Amanda. Fred is proud of his "car". It is revealed the off-panel "car" is actually a camel.
Kids these days, always checking Instagram, and using electricity instead of making candles out of cow fat.


#171: AI Heist (Part Nine)

Eric the holographic computer is saying, "What-how-", hovering in the air. "GO, GO, GO!" says Max, and Max and Fred try to run through a doorway. Eric says "NO WAY!" and the steel door with caution tape at the bottom SLAMs shut downwards. "Oh no, we're doomed!" says Fred. "Wait...NGHH...CHOMP" says Max and bites a hole in the door, which they jump through. Eric says "Hey! Do you know how much that'll cost to replace?"
< First "What strong jaws you have, Grandma!" "The better for biting holes in steel doors with, dear!"


#168: AI Heist (Part Six)

Fred is standing in front of a singed wall with a gigantic hole in it. "Let Max go. OR ELSE." he says, picking up an electric Tesla car charger. "I'm not letting Max go. He's a threat to my plans. And why would I be afraid of an electric car charger?" says Cutie Pie. "You asked for it." says Fred. CLICK He turns on the charger and, like a hose, FSSH it shoots out a jet of liquid electricity which zaps Cutie Pie KZZT.
Forms of energy: thermal, chemical, electrical, nuclear, electromagnetic, motion, sound, elastic, gravitational and liquid.



#164: AI Heist (Part Two)

Cutie Pie, holding a microSD card, is standing next to some kind of covered hole. "AHAHAHAHAHA! Yess, with this AI I could finally finish the calculations! And take over the world!" BEEP he presses a button. CHUNK the hole opens and a holographic projector emerges VRR BZZ BEEP and projects a holographic laptop, which Cutie Pie takes. "It begins." he says, and plugs the microSD card into the laptop.
Wait, how did you get a holographic laptop? How can you touch it if it's made of light? And why does it have a microSD port?


#163: AI Heist (Part One)

Max tells Fred, "Hey Fred, come check this out!" He taps a panel next to a door with a light above it. BZZT The door slides upward, the panel and light turning from red to green. FSSH They enter to see a hologram of a circle surrounded by complex patterns. "What is it?" asks Fred. "The world's most powerful AI!" says Max. "Sure hope it doesn't get stolen for malicious purposes." says Fred. CRASH YARGH! Cutie Pie, hanging from a bungee cord, drops through the ceiling, leaving a hole, plaster chunks scattering. Max and Fred are annoyed. Zoom in on Cutie Pie's hand as he takes a microSD 16GB card out of the hologram projector. An arrow pointing to the microSD card declares that it "Contains superintelligent AI". ZWIP Cutie Pie bungees up, grinning. The hologram machine is dark. "That was fast." says Fred. "I'm suprised. Most villains take the monitor too." says Max.
On December 12, 2035, a superintelligent AI was created. It decided to destroy mankind. Someone accidentally tripped over the cord and it shut down.


#160: How the Calendar was Made

Fred is talking to the months of the year, represented as hovering glowing blue spheres with eyes and similar-looking hands. "So we're gonna probably pay you each 30 days per year. Some of you will get extras. February, you'll only get 28-" "WHAT?!?" screams February. The tired Fred says, "Listen, this is going to be hard. We'll bump it up to 29 when we can. Jan, March, May, July, October, December- you can have the extras." "YAAAAY!" "I WANT ONE!!" says August. "August, we don't have enough for-" begins Fred. August turns purple and picks up the table, spilling drinks and scattering papers. "ARRGH!" he says. "OK, FINE!!" screams Fred. He stands on top of the overturned table, giving a dramatic speech. "Listen, guys. We don't have money. But we have PERSISTENCE. We can make this work if we COOPERATE. That means no more flipping tables. Remember what Alan Turing said -"They may have our horses, and our iPads, but they'll never take our freedom!" "YEAH!" scream most of the months. "wait, what?" says one.
They may take my money, or my cat, but they'll never take my teddy bear! BTW, Happy Pride Month!!! 🏳️‍🌈🥳